Monday, January 5, 2009

It's the most wonderful time of the year! (Back to school)

So, I'm now officially pregnant with my IP's baby(ies?) but am still waiting for my new numbers to come in on Wednesday. This has been a really long week for me, starting with the mere fact that my children have been out of school for two friggin' weeks already. Well actually, today is their first day back (yay!!) so the house is a little quieter. Two weeks trapped in a house with a seven and five year old who demand my attention 24/7 is highly exhausting. I love them, but good lord above can they drive a woman mad!

Fighting is the least favorite quality my children posses. As the clock strikes 6:15 in the morning, my two darlings would instantly quarrel over what cartoons (horrible I know. Who the hell is their mother?) to watch. As I would sit patiently - and barley awake - drinking my (decaf) coffee I could literally envision sending both of them off to military training. Do they have military training for elementary age, or is this just a vivid dream that I am now solely responsible for making a reality? Oh well, if I must, I must. My kids do look rather smashing in camouflage.

By noon they would have each other in headlocks, trying with all their tiny might to rip each and every strand of hair from the other's head. I bet my son now wishes he would have gotten a regular haircut instead of the "I just want a little bit cut, I'm growing it out" mop he currently has. For kids to fight over television channels, toys, my attention, dad's attention, what color angels are, who is eating the last pear, or who brushes their teeth first is just plain rude. I say it does take a village to raise children, and I will drop them off at your house this weekend.

I hope this is a lesson for all the parents out there who constantly threaten their children with "I'm so totally sending you to the Army!", I will be figuring out how to make this united dream come alive. Of course my idea of the military is someone in fatigues screaming at them to brush their teeth correctly and to pick up their messes. But, in that case, I suppose I'm already a General to their Private. Wow, being promoted is nice, and I can't wait for the perks.